So I am going to try to get this blog going again for a very specific reason. That reason–I am finding my dissertation incredibly slow-going at the moment–is self-indulgent to say the least but that’s what blogs are for. I have been reading about all these strategies that I have seen other writers employ and none of them seem to strike a cord so I am going to borrow something from my art practice and see if it sticks.
With my artwork I usually have a longer term project that is process intensive going on in the background (I have two right now). What this enables me to do is when every thing else seems stopped up, I can always work on these pieces without much thought. Surprisingly (or not), this work usually loosens something else up in my brain. So this blog, for the time being, is going to be the thing I can work on sort of aimlessly without a real agenda. I am going to make myself write for no less than 10 minutes but no more than 30 every day I need to work on my dissertation. Given my previous track records with blogs this will last approximately two weeks. I can going to up the shame factor by publishing these to Facebook, the technology that most rouses my feelings of inadequacy. I will be an open wound. There will typos, which is coincidentally the title of my dissertation right now. Congrats to the two people who made it this far.
My dissertation is about the over-determined nature of creativity in our world. It relies heavily on philosophy and art history. It will be sleep inducing except to those people for who it isn’t. I care so much about how it reads it makes me neurotic. This is one of my problems right now, but I do like the sections I have right now, so maybe it works.
Another problem that really isn’t a problem is that Shannon and I decided to keep Miles home from daycare this summer. I have spending the days with him and then, sometime after dinner two or three nights a week, I head to the coffee shop to try and figure out where I am. I read during his naps (sometimes) and I have a black notebook I keep in my pocket in case something strikes while we are at the playground or playing the most ill-defined game of checkers two humans have ever played (Miles likes all his pieces on the red squares and all of mine on the blacks; I make patterns with my pieces to entertain myself). We also bought a house this summer and moved. I am a little surprised anything got done at all even if the chapter I have right now is 25 pages of primordial ooze in twelve point font.
My days with Miles have been totally exhausting, mentally mostly. He will be three this week and is amazing most of the time unless he needs to eat, is tired or decides that he is practicing non-violent resistance measures like refusing to have a skeleton that can stand up. Several times a day I feel so full of joy I well up and at least once a day I want to lock him in a closet. So it goes…
Shannon has been working crazy hours too, so we have been trying to sneak in tiny moments together like slowly watching Arrested Development, even if one of us usually ends up falling asleep. She is also pregnant and due in January, so I am sure things will really settle down then. I have to acknowledge publicly that she is an amazing mom and I don’t understand how she does everything she does. I am a little envious of her energy even if she looks like she is going to doze off mid-ice cream bite here.
I don’t have much more to add at the moment without getting too specific and bumping up against my self-imposed time limit here. I guess I will say this: the new Vampire Weekend record is still very, very good. I don’t know what I will write about next time, but it will be something. That post will be Thursday. Unless it isn’t. Here we go again.